My Time in Hades

For the longest time
I slept like the dead
The longest journey
In the caravan of Dream
Death taught me things
I used to be filled with rage
At the world
Now,  I just yearn to Live
And find Truth
Discernment
Is a precious gift
Taken for granted
Until it is lost

For the longest time
I slept like the dead
The longest journey
In the caravan of Dream
Death taught me things
I did not drink
Of the waters of Lethe
Every second of my past
Was revealed to me
Breaking free of Chronos
And his cycle of pain
Was the only thing
That mattered

For the longest time
I slept like the dead
The longest journey
In the caravan of Dream
Death taught me things
Had I been possessed
When I ODd on prescription meds
To end this pain?
Every moment since then
Was a haunted house of horrors
I ‘live’ now in stark terror
Of still being ‘alive’
And losing the little I have left

…

Responsibility
Too heavy on my weak shoulders
No talent,  no drive,  no future
Everything I touch withers
Will I live in pain forever
Damned for eternity
In this hell I’ve created?
No friends,  no tribe, no people
I shut myself off, to dream
Safe within a foetal embrace
Too ill to Live, too guilty to die
Too scared to cause pain to the few
Who still love me

…

I dream of Life
But I’ve not forgotten
The lessons of death
Specks of dust, souls divine
Goodbye
To all the plans that we made
No contracts
I’m free to do as I may
No hunger
No sleep except to dream
Mild and warm
Safe from all harm
Calm

Can I use these lessons to live again?

My persona is slowly crumbling

My ambitions, my goals…

Good riddance