I’m Not a Boar!!!

“Go with the flow
You are the man with the show
Don’t stop to say ‘hello’
And do not pass go”

I heard her shuffling rhyme
I watched her dance in time
Through the air above
Wind carrying her body and words
While I drank toddy and slurped up curds
Banana fritters for dessert
While my soul withered in the desert
I felt deserted
By my family and friends–
Many of them anyway–
My presence ruined their day
They didn’t so much as say, ‘hey’
I felt desserted
There’s chocolate in the fridge
And sweet banana chips
In the snack box
Sugar is toxic
But
Food brings comfort

I used to bench 120 kg
Every day was a date with the gym
It started as a whim
But turned into an addiction
I’m beginning to get fat
It’s what happens when
You maintain your appetite
Without any activity
Four years of sleep
Have ruined me
I have to start again
Start small with twenty
I’ll probably sprain something
I’ve already injured my wings

HIIT!!!

Can’t fly no more
I used to soar
Wasn’t a boar
…
I mean bore
…
But I’m no boar as well
At least I hope not
Perhaps I’m a boar
Who dreams he’s a man
And this is all a nightmare
I’m being tricked
By the gods of dreams
That’s quite wicked
And cruel
I eat gruel
For breakfast
But I over do lunch
I am too lazy to cook
I’d rather read a book
It’s inefficient
The way I do things
I’m a perfectionist
In the kitchen
And it takes me
Two hours
To make chicken curry
…
Half an hour to buy the ingredients
…
Fifteen minutes to wash the dishes
…
Fifteen minutes to eat
…
Three hours for a meal
Thank God I’m not French
Or I’d be spending half the day
Cooking and eating
Does eating pork
Make me a cannibal?
No! I’m no boar
And this is no dream
I have to stop
Coming apart at the seams
I have to take responsibility
Manage my property
Enrichen my spiritual poverty
And make it past mid life puberty

“By my toe!
Nice flow!!!
But you can do better
Maybe next time
There will be more rhyme
And you’ll stop talking about fetters”

She wants me to stop now
So I’ll make my bow
But, holy cow!
It’s been a while
Since I wrote this way
It feels good,  I say
Maybe someday
I’ll write like this again
…
Probably Wednesday
But I won’t promise when
The flow comes and goes
Unlike my woes

A/N: I’ve just realized that I’m actually a pretty good cook. It just takes too damn long for a single meal that’s over in fifteen minutes.